A race against time

At Northwick Park Hospital, David was given thrombolysis, a clot-busting drug. When that didn’t work, he was transferred to Charing Cross Hospital for a thrombectomy to remove the blockage.

‘It was the longest night of my life,’ Julia says quietly. ‘We had no idea what was happening. The whole thing was delayed because of confusion over his name. David is actually his middle name, and in the panic of the stroke, we gave the wrong date of birth so they couldn’t find him on the system. Those hours waiting were unbearable. I remember sobbing into my pillow thinking he must have died.’

A life before stroke

David had worked at Charing Cross Hospital for 40 years, ending his career as Divisional Manager of Histopathology. ‘I was always very proud of my work,’ he says. ‘I wanted to make sure patients received the best service possible.'

In retirement, David began part-time research into digital pathology with a private company. ‘It was fascinating,’ he says. ‘I enjoyed staying involved and contributing to something new.’

Julia adds: ‘David was one of those people who never stopped. He wrote 47 academic papers on immunocytochemistry, he sang in two church choirs, wrote poetry and lyrics for musicals, read constantly and loved amateur dramatics. He was fit and active. He loved shopping, gardening, and was a great cook. He’d get up at the crack of dawn full of energy every day.’

David smiles faintly. ‘Yes, I loved performing and keeping busy. I’ve always enjoyed being part of something creative.’

Recovery begins

After the thrombectomy, which restored blood flow to his brain, David was transferred twice before moving to the Neurological Rehabilitation Centre at Edgware Hospital.

‘It felt like a revolving door,’ Julia recalls. ‘Each hospital was trying to help, but with so many moves, nobody really knew his full case history.’

‘When I first woke up after the thrombectomy in the Acute Stroke Unit,’ David says, ‘I remember thinking, ‘Why can’t I move my left side?’ Everything felt heavy. My brain knew what to do, but my body wouldn’t respond.’

The long road back

David spent three months in hospital and rehab. ‘The separation was unbearable,’ says Julia. ‘Our 32nd wedding anniversary fell five days after David's stroke. We had never been apart for more than a few days in all those years.

'I have to keep remembering just how far David has come. In the beginning David's speech was really slurred. Thankfully this improved quite quickly although his word finding is still impaired. From then on David's long, slow rehab journey began. It seems like a miracle when I think back to the first time he was able to move his fingers and when he tentatively started to walk again.’

Learning to live differently

When he was discharged, planned community physiotherapy wasn't possible because David had already spent three months in hospital. So the family paid privately.

David says. ‘The physios and occupational therapists at Edgware were amazing. They got me walking again. But when you leave hospital, you feel like you’ve been dropped like a lead ballon. You’re in a whole new world that no one has prepared you for.’

The stroke has left David with several long-term effects, including weakness, increased tone and spasticity on his left side, left foot drop, and visual impairment.

Julia says: ‘The vision loss wasn’t diagnosed until about two years after the stroke. The ophthalmologist said the optic nerve had been permanently damaged, probably by the thrombectomy.’

David continues: ‘I suffer from fatigue even though I sleep well at night, and usually have an afternoon nap. Reading is difficult, I can’t process text like I used to. Word finding is difficult too and I often say the opposite of what I mean!’

Julia smiles softly. ‘He can be so confusing, but we’ve learned to laugh about it.’

Strength, patience and progress

‘You have to,' he agrees. 'Emotionally, it’s not easy. I’d say my mental health is ‘not as good as it used to be,’ but I’m learning to live with it.’

‘Life has changed immeasurably,’ Julia says. ‘He doesn’t drive, things that used to be second nature are now a challenge, and I have to help him with a lot of daily tasks. But he’s still the same person inside, determined, clever and kind.’

David reflects thoughtfully: ‘It is very hard, but you can always improve. Everyone’s stroke is different. There is a path to recovery; it just takes a long, long time. You may not recover fully, but you have to make the best of what you have left.’

Julia nods. ‘We’ve both had to learn patience. You can’t rush recovery. Every small gain matters.’

Support makes a difference

Julia found comfort in the Stroke Association Helpline. ‘I called several times,’ she says. ‘I was worried that I was taking too much time but the people I spoke to were incredibly sympathetic and supportive.

The Helpline gave me advice, reassurance and most of all they listened to me and understood how I was feeling. When you leave hospital, you feel completely on your own, but the Stroke Association was there for me.

Julia

David’s former drama group and choir also raised money for the Stroke Association. 'That meant a lot,’ David says. ‘It felt like they were standing with me.’

A quieter life, still full of purpose

Four years on, life for David and Julia is quieter, slower, but still filled with gratitude.

‘I’ve learned to take things day by day,’ David says. ‘Each day used to be filled to capacity. Now it’s about small steps, being able to walk a little better, or cook something simple, or sing with the choir again.’

Julia smiles. ‘He sings beautifully and I love hearing his voice. He still surprises me with his determination.’

Despite the challenges, David has rediscovered his love of poetry. His writing is simpler now and more direct, but deeply heartfelt. Sharing his poetry gives him great satisfaction and purpose. It allows him to express emotions that are sometimes hard to put into everyday words.

David adds: ‘I’m not who I was before, but I’m still me.” He wrote this poem last autumn.